Monday, July 19, 2010

Our New Sponsor: S-Mart!

Hey Children of the Night.

The blog and podcast has a new sponsor--S-Mart! This ad features none other than S-Mart's number one sales associate, Ash Williams! Remember, shop smart--shop S-Mart! They have a whole assortment of chainsaws, boomsticks, and necronomicons.

And don't forget the blue light special this Sunday. They are practically giving away a Deadite dismemberment kit--complete with sawed-off boomstick, shells, miniature flame thrower (a personal favorite), and spare buzzsaw chains.

They also have a whole array of Cthulu toys for the kids! Get The new Lovecraft Joe action playset! It comes complete with H.P. Lovecraft, Edgar Allan Poe, Mary Shelley, and Robert E. Howard action figures! Join them, on their quest to rid the world of eldritch abominations! We also have a wide selection from the Savage World of Conan--including a reproduction of his famous broadsword, and a range of action figures!

For the teens, they have To Hell with Twilight! by the disembodied spirit of Bram Stoker--channelled by competent spirit mediums. You can also find an array of the latest Goth fashions--including mesh tops, combat boots, and latex dresses for back to school.

And for the parents--Occult Marriage Practices by Bennet T. Cenobite--the "holy" non-biblical love manual. It comes with a free assortment of mini-floggers and handcuffs. 

You'll find it all at S-Mart! Remember, "Shop smart--shop S-Mart!"

In Love and Monsters,
Johnny Zombie!

Coming this week to The Dungeon: EXORCISM!

No comments:

Post a Comment